The Power of Saying No: How Embracing Your Messy Middle Can Transform Your Photography Business
Monday, September 08, 2025 | By: Kate DeCoste Photography
As photographers, we’re often told to “do it all.” Seniors, headshots, weddings, newborns—you name it, we’re behind the camera for it. But here’s the truth: not every job, not every genre, and not every client is meant for you. Sometimes, the most powerful word in your business toolkit is one little word: No.
In the latest episode of The One Behind the Lens, I dive deep into the freedom and clarity that comes from saying no. I share my personal journey of realizing what drained me—and what fueled my creativity—and why setting boundaries is one of the kindest things you can do for yourself and your business.
The Messy Middle: Where the Magic Happens
Every photographer has a story. And often, the part of your story that shapes your brand isn’t the highlight reel—it’s the messy middle. The messy middle is where anxiety, doubt, and stress meet the choice to do things differently. It’s where you discover your strengths, your preferences, and your true creative voice.
For me, the messy middle looked like weddings and newborn sessions. While they’re dream gigs for some photographers, they left me drained, anxious, and exhausted. The pressure wasn’t just during the shoot—it carried over into editing, album design, and deadlines. Even with a shot list in hand, the stress was overwhelming.
No as a Complete Sentence
I remember when a friend told me, “No is a complete sentence.” At first, it sounded blunt, even harsh. But the more I practiced it, the more I realized how freeing it could be. Saying no doesn’t mean rejecting people—it means choosing the work that lights you up instead of draining you.
For example, when I said no to weddings and newborns, it opened the door to what I truly love: high school senior and headshot sessions. One-on-one shoots where I can get to know my clients, play with light and posing, and truly make people feel seen.
Lessons Learned from a Missed Moment
Of course, learning to say no doesn’t mean perfection. I’ll admit, early in my wedding photography days, I missed a moment—the bride with her mother—despite having a shot list. It was heartbreaking, and it taught me a crucial lesson: even with planning, mistakes happen, but focusing on what you love and where you can shine is worth it.
Your Weekly Challenge
This week, I challenge you to:
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Identify one thing in your photography business that you’ve been saying yes to, even though it doesn’t bring you joy.
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Practice saying no. Write it down if you need to. Don’t justify it, don’t explain it—just say no.
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Notice the space it creates for the projects and clients that truly excite you.
Remember: no isn’t rejection. No is a boundary, a filter, a complete sentence—and it can change your business, your creativity, and your life.
Resources to Help You Say Yes to What Matters
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📸 Shutter Squad inspiration & photography community: @katedecoste
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🌐 Kate’s website & booking info: www.katedecostephotography.com
Saying no doesn’t make you difficult—it makes you intentional. It helps you focus on what lights you up, hones your craft, and lets you create the work you love.
So Shutter Squad, let’s say no to what drains us and yes to the joy, creativity, and freedom waiting on the other side.
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